Prose & Poetry


 mamabebe

So fragile, so small
But soon you would be growing tall
So frail, so light
But soon you would hug me tight

Struggling up, tumbling down
Your forehead crinkling in a frown
Crawling fast, jumping high
Your fingers reaching for the sky

Twinkly eyes, silken cheeks
Prettier as days meld into weeks
Chubby hands, stubby toes
A gently blossoming little rose

Baby Martha, my miracle
I would care for you so well
Little angel, wish come true
I so greatly do love you

Broken Wings

You know..

you know you’re in love when you seem so far and you can’t feel her heartbeat anymore..
and you miss every second of your life without hearing each beat..

you know you’re in love when mornings seem endless and fruitful, no matter how stormy the weather is outside..
because you know deep inside that a rainbow shields you from the darkest of problems..

you know you’re in love when you can barely breathe when she stops talking..
because her voice is the air to your soul..

you know you’re in love when the past seems to be erased like a clean slate..
and you are so ready to draw the future by guiding each other’s hand..

you know you’re in love when pain seems pleasurable..
as long as you see her everytime of the day..

i’m sorry honey..
i love you..
and i’ll be your wings until you can fly again..

– As written by my husband, James, in response to the above-posted wallpaper I made after we had a misunderstanding several months ago.  James and I may not have the most perfect of all relationships, but together, we learn and grow.  Because at the end of the day what matters is not how rarely we fight with each other, but how often we understand each other.

     He was a star.

     I chanced upon him one night not too long ago. He was perfect. He resided mighty high up in the sky where no mortal can ever reach him; yet his luminosity reached far across heaven and earth. His brightness in the skies was dazzling; juxtaposed with all the heavenly bodies that make up the constellations, his light radiated the most.

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     Once upon a time, there was a disillusioned girl who fell in love with a seemingly unattainable guy; a guy she had no business falling in love with in the first place.  A guy who was always there to listen, to understand, to care… who never failed to remind her to take her meals on time and who sang for her whenever she felt sad.  A guy who was someone else’s boyfriend.  A guy who was her best friend.

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Tell me…

Is there anything more pleasurable than pain..?

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     I was digging through the depths of my hard drive when I found a file that I haven’t opened in over a year.  It was a love story, albeit a virtual one.  And though it is a chapter that has been ended, bound, and sealed, I have this unexplainable compulsion to have a fleeting glimpse of it, and to share that glimpse with all who would like to see.  Yes, I am beyond happy with the chapter I am in right now, in the virtual and in the real world.  But that cannot eradicate the fact that once upon a time, in the virtual world that was Fenrir, there was a fleeting moment wherein the Lord Knight Deirdre Winterflame fell in love with the Mastersmith Hugh Hefner, an affirmation of the feelings that were unfolding in the real world.  This is their story…

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     It was a Thursday, but seeing the throngs of people strolling along the restaurant row, you’d think it was another holiday weekend.  Among the crowd, a guy and girl were walking hand in hand.  They were seemingly wrapped up in their own world; whispering softly while people were chattering gaily, walking unhurriedly while others were bustling about.  I wondered what it was that’s so special about this particular couple that caught my eye; maybe it was the way they looked at each other, as if they were the only two people in the world… or maybe it was the way they kept their hands joined while waltzing about to avoid crashing into people, as if letting go was the last thing on their minds… or maybe it was the impression they gave off, as if there were no two people happier and more at peace than they were.

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For all the songs I didn’t sing
     For all the sorrow that you did bring…
For all the tears that I have cried
     For all the times you’ve ran and lied…

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     This is one of those times when even I could not understand myself.  I am happy and content.  While there may be challenges every now and then, I still feel that I am blessed.  I have a wonderful family, a great job, and a perfect relationship.  But just when I decided to pen out my thoughts of thanks for James, I found myself writing a poem that is so overflowing with despair.  And while its contents may not be the reflection of my emotions right now, I would nonetheless like to share this with everyone.  If you would rather…

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     Ask me what it is and I don’t know why…  We really haven’t had the time to talk and see each other the past few weeks.  I really do miss him, and it’s only now that I’ve come to realize how much I have come to depend on his constant presence… It was my saving grace while I was in Japan, and the joy of my existence since I came back here…  I love him… and I need him almost as much as that…

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