Moon Angel

Lying, thinking

Last Night

How to find my soul a home

Where water is not thirsty

And bread loaf is not stone

I came up with one thing

And I don’t believe I’m wrong

That nobody

But nobody

Can make it out here alone…

 

-excerpt from Maya Angelou’s poem “Alone“

 

    Wishing on stars… one habit I have never outgrown.  When I was a little girl, I would scramble onto my mother’s lap as she sat by the window, and I would watch in daze and awe as the brilliant sunset colors faded away into the twilight, until at last, all would be dark and quiet and serene. And as the stars slowly came into view, I would close my eyes and make a wish.  As an adolescent struggling through growing pains, I would take off my glasses and rub my eyes as the light became insufficient for reading.  And then, I would get up from my favorite corner at the library and I’d go to the windows, watching the same scene that I have so loved since childhood, and as the stars slowly winked and twinkled in a seemingly endless flirtation with the world, I would sigh softly, lift up my face to catch the moonlight, and make my wish.  Mother said that  my name, Selene Celestialle, meant “moon in the heavens“  and such a name is proof that a close kinship to the stars was my birthright.

     When I was a child, stars were playmates that tickled me with their light.  We played hide and seek; and no matter how good a hiding place I found, I could never completely shake off that glow.  As I grew older, stars became my constant companions; confidantes that were silent witnesses to my tears and my dreams.  They became my friends, and somehow, it didn’t matter so much that other teens my age weren’t so keen on making my acquaintance.  Who needed a crowd of acquaintances when there are millions in the heavens who are audience to my dreams?  Still, being alone did hurt.  Sometimes, it hurt a lot.  But there was little I could do to change the fact that others seemed loathe to be friends with a quiet, unobtrusive girl with thick glasses, who either had her nose stuck in an alchemical manual or had her eyes staring dreamily at the stars.

     Through the years, my dreams have ranged from the most trivial to the most fantastical.  My mind’s firmest ambition was to be one of Midgard’s best Biochemists.  But at times, when the night winds blow colder, my mind’s ambition is overshadowed by my heart’s dearest yearning; and that is to find someone who could make me feel that I am not alone.

     Day by day, with dedication and a firm resolve, I got closer and closer to my mind’s ambition.  I studied hard and worked through my apprenticeship even harder until at last the Institut du Alchemie granted me the title of Biochemist when I was just eighteen.  Now, all that is left is more hard work and more dedication, for being mediocre was the farthest thing from my mind.  I wanted to be one of the best, and if it meant working late at night after spending an entire day gathering alchemical syllicates or brewing potions at the laboratory, so be it.  Ironically though, it seemed that the closer I got to my mind’s ambition, the farther I became my heart’s yearning.

     Until I met him…

     He was a servant of faith.  And just when I have almost given up my belief in the human spirit and in a higher being, just when I have almost placed my full belief into the science that was alchemy, he rekindled my hope and renewed my faith.  He showed me the true wonder behind each syllicate and the sublime purpose behind each potion.  He taught me that true beauty can be seen not in artificial life creation; true beauty can be seen through the hands of the Creator of life.  He made me realize that I need not keep my eyes fixated on the heavens for my dreams; I only needed to look around me and see that each creature and each person is a blessing and a little dream-come-true.

     Most of all he showed me that I am not alone.  I never was.  And from then on he has been proving that fact to me in so many ways.  He is my angel and my miracle.  And now I have come to see that potions are brewed not so much for the advancement of knowledge, as it is for the rejuvenation of people.  Each day with him brings about more wonderful realizations, and when my desire for knowledge was replaced by the desire to help, I found that my work has become all the more rewarding.

     Now, I may be one of Midgard’s best Biochemists; mentored by the Institut du Alchemie’s most exalted professors, and counted among the Alchemical community’s most reliable researchers - but the greatest teacher I could ask for isn’t a respected professor or a brewing genius.  For I have long since realized that the best of life’s lessons can never be learned through books or through any amount of research.  The best of life’s lessons are taught with gentle guidance and eyes full of love.  The best of life’s lessons are best internalized with supreme faith.  And he, who so gently held my hand and led me towards the path to self-discovery and self-actualization, would be  the one that I would always be grateful to.

     You are my life’s greatest blessing, Angel Uriel.  I love you…