Thoughts for Anna

     Real love is when two people can go through the toughest problems without asking for promises or listing criteria.  Sometimes, it’s hard not to fall into the trap of pinning down the wrongs and the shortcomings, such that we tend to overlook the things that make the relationship unique, and sweet, and poignant - the things that kept us holding on despite the pain, the distance, the challenges, the distance, the arguments, the distance, the distance…

     The people we love the most would inevitably let us down and hurt us, knowingly or unknowingly, at one time or another.  But then love need not be equal to be fair, it only needs to be true.  We always have a choice.  That’s why I believe that while falling in love may be a spontaneous process, staying in love is a decision - something that we make up our mind to work on because we know that the “we” and the “us” is worth it.

     I’ve read about an entry you once wrote on closing the distance between two points in a plane.  You said that it’s either you draw a line or fold the plane so that the two points would meet.  In a relationship, do you wait for someone else to draw the line for you? Would someone else have to fold the plane when you want the points to meet? Does anyone have to put the pen in your hand for you to take initiative? Does it even matter?

     No, you don’t wait.  And it doesn’t matter who holds the pen more often, or who draws the most part of the line, or who made the plane all crinkly with clumsy hands while folding.  What matters is that you CAN be together if you make the choice to do so.  And all the problems in the world may be thrown at you but you can still find yourself blissfully happy because at the end of the day, you know it’s all worth it.

     As James said, distance maims, but love braves the distance.  And love can brave a lot more than that.  It’s always a matter of commitment and conviction, and much faith.